This has happened after I had finished high school. I was still looking for my true way; to find that would be best for me in this life. Too many things were beyond my understanding and I didn’t pretend that they were gonna just come to me by themselves. I didn’t see them going to other people by themselves. Only that other people were fine without them. They didn’t even know what they were missing. I wanted to understand them. They were too disconcerting. This feeling was so strong in me, they did not let me quiet down and rest. I had to search them. Deep down I knew that these were paths untraveled. The path – I was going to make myself. It was not easy to make that decision, to bear the consequences. The path could lead into nowhere. I could have become weak, would I just give it up, and turn back halfway around? It could become such a flimsy path that it would disappear into nothingness.

Yes. All these consequences were possible outcomes as with every major endeavor like this. It would have been easier to follow the path of being in school. Then doing a job. Then getting old and becoming satisfied with what everyone else had become satisfied with. That shadows and fears were gonna surround the fact of death? Everyone else had accepted it… The majority definitely had accepted it. I definitely wanted to break away from that majority. Living so blindly just wasn’t acceptable.

This way, I was thinking a lot about life, about the connections between our lives and other phenomena. I had studied my dreams. Thank God, that I did! Now this has an enormous meaning in my life. I didn’t believe it that our dreams are only the result of our brains reorganizing itself. Maybe some of the dreams are about the brain as a majestic computer. But many of our dreams are way beyond this. Some of the dreams are overly nuanced and complicated, containing unbelievably sophisticated symbols, holding the sharpest mirrors to our lives with spot reflector lights shining into dark areas of our lives that we could never see and understand otherwise. Sometimes, they contain downright mysterious meanings. Secret information to be deciphered. The following dream of mine was like this and it had stamped on my mind for good.

In my dream, I was walking on a road that I was following, and a lot of things had happened that I saw, heard and felt; a lot of small happenings. Then, from one moment to the next, I saw the same road that I was walking on but now from above. That’s when I realized that I popped out of my body and now I could see everything from above. That wasn’t the only difference, though. Everything that I was seeing, I was seeing in a different way; in a wholesome way. When I was outside and above, everything made sense. Like as if someone had explained things, of why things were happening. I also felt lighter, more at ease about the happenings. There wasn’t that heavy feeling of being that I always felt while being in my body. I could see a variety of different ways for me to live my life, and I knew it very well that I could choose between them. I also saw foreign places and countries in Europe, and I could see in general what my life would be if I chose to live there.

On the other hand, when I was in my body again, I was absolutely bogged down by small and sometimes tiny observations and feelings. I was completely covered over by the small things and details of life.

When I stayed very close to my body but was outside of my body again, just right above my body, I could feel the freedom of the soul again. That was such a feeling that I have never felt while being in my body.

When I was in my body, I had no idea how I could be outside of my body at the same time and see my life in its entirety. The small things literally bogged my soul into my body. I was fascinated by what I could see of these two entirely different state of beings. I knew the state of being in my body very well but I was still shocked by how short sighted one is while inside the body. I also came to understand that only in the body could I, could my soul experience the most because of the tiny things that I lived through in every second.

Outside the body, on the other hand, we can see the miracle of the being; everything is harmonious, there are choices and a peace of mind unparalleled by anything else.

When I saw this in my dream, there weren’t any books about NDEs, about these phenomena. I only saw these things in my dream but they were such a life changing experience. It couldn’t have any more of an effect on me if it had happened to me ‘in real life’. I looked at life differently again from here on, and I was looking for methods of reaching this state of being again.

God bless everyone!

Image: Geralt

Adrienne